a filipina in the philippines.
18. birthday's on june 27th. cancerian. oxen.
eldest of four kids. youngest in the barkada.
assumption antipolo batch 2002 high school graduate.
college sophomore.
currently taking up bs architecture in university of the philippines diliman.
currently in a relationship with a hobbit and loving it!
internet addict. couch potato. hopeless romantic but also a cynic.
sarcastic. pessimistic. incessant procrastinator. nasty. sweet. schizo.
insomniac. lazy-ass. artist. writer. bookworm. chocolate addict. perpetual crammer.
snob at times. anti-social. weird. crazy.
loves catcher in the rye and les miserables.
harry potter fanatic. can't live without charmed, friends, smallville, amazing race, sex and the city.
listens to stephen speaks, john mayer, dishwalla, alicia keys, alanis morisette, dave matthews band, matchbox 20.
loves watching soccer, tennis, basketball. adores andy roddick, ryan philippe, gael garcia bernal and raul gonzales.
likes van gogh paintings, fairy tales, gothic cathedrals.
wishes to go to europe. wants to design a tower and write a best-seller. wants to grow taller. wants a perfect set of sparkling white teeth.
dreams of a simple life.
It's been a good blogging life at Blogspot. But, I had been thinking about moving to Blogdrive and well, I've decided that's what I'm gonna do. This blog's just not doing it for me anymore... It's been fun. A lot memories, a lot of joys and frustrations kept in here. But at this phase of my life... It's time for some changes. For those who've added me... please change the link. It's now at http://sweetmelancholy.blogdrive.com. Thanks so much. Love you all. Farewell, dear blog.Ü
. by [ margaux ] at [ 4:50 AM ] [ archive ] .
. . . . .
[ Tuesday, March 30, 2004 ]
Never knew that so much tears could come out from me...
. by [ margaux ] at [ 10:10 AM ] [ archive ] .
. . . . .
[ Thursday, March 18, 2004 ]
Love Actually was uber nice.Ü Just watched it with Jid this afternoon... and I really loved it.Ü It was one of those movies that didn't try too hard to please the viewers. It was simple, honest and real... It really made me think and see things in a different light.Ü
. by [ margaux ] at [ 4:39 AM ] [ archive ] .
. . . . .
[ Sunday, March 14, 2004 ]
Just before HELL WEEK...
Wish me luck!
March 16 AS1 Report: History of Fashion in the Philippines
March 17 GE11 Second Exam
March 18 EnvSci1 Third Exam
EnvSci Term Paper
March 22 Arch22 Design Plate # 3
March 23 AS1 Final Paper
March 25 Math 53 Final Exam!!!
March 29 Arch23 Materials Board
*Arch18 Finals - I have no idea when this will be...
Phew. So help me dear God...
. by [ margaux ] at [ 4:52 AM ] [ archive ] .
. . . . .
[ Friday, March 12, 2004 ]
Six months, 3 days, 12+ hours
I'm craziest and yet, luckiest girl in the world when it comes to my boyfriend.
He drives early and arrives at the Math Building everyday around 7:30 to 8:00 am (and waits/sleeps in the car) even though his first class isn't till 10:00 am just so he could see me and spend time with me after my class. He calls me everytime I ask him to or whenever I feel bored or depressed and those phonecalls last for hours - and yes, those were long-distance phonecalls. He spends a lot of money on me whenever we go out, and even though most of the time we go Dutch, he still ends up paying a lot more than I do. He buys me medicine when I am sick, or pain-relievers whenever I have dysmennorhea. (And you know what... no matter how crappy the last few days have been and no matter how depressed I had become, he still manages to put a smile on my face.)
I don't know what he saw and what he sees in me, but I'm really, really thankful that he's with me and sticking by me. I'm not the most beautiful girl in the world, and yet he adores me. I can be really bitchy and whiny in between mood swings, and yet he still cares for me. And most of all, I can be really crazy... and I do mean, psycho-crazy, and yet he still loves me.
How crazy? Who ever fakes "tampo" about the littlest things just so she could frustrate her boyfriend? Who ever tells her boyfriend that she'll never be depressed again if he lets her pick out/take out 15 hairs from his legs? Who ever texts her boyfriend (who commuted from his mom's office in Ateneo to UP just to see her for a little while) that she's already back at her dorm when in reality she's still in school all along, then take it back just before her boyfriend decides to get back on a Katipunan jeep? Who ever slams a notebook on her boyfriend's head just coz she feels like it; or pinches him like crazy whenever she's bored; or ties little clumps of his hair in elastic bands; or rolls up his sleeves and his pant-legs and make him walk around the college looking like an idiot? Who makes fun of her boyfriend by making a bad impression of his weird and somewhat conyo accent and even encourages their blockmates to join along in mocking and mimicking him? Who ever keeps the car door wide open whenever they're parked on a street and her side is the one on the road and freaking him out whenever a car would pass by? Who watches the Survivor live-telecast on Friday afternoons then deliberately spoils it for her boyfriend? Who ever makes her boyfriend call her (long-distance at that) then would not talk for at least five minutes or press the phone keys just because she wanted to play around?
That's just some of the things I make him go through everyday. I am such a horrible girlfriend. Still, after everything that I've done, he just holds me tight in an embrace, kisses me on the forehead and tells me that, "You're so crazy, but I still love you. I don't know why, but I still do..."
Yes, I think I must be the most difficult girlfriend to have in the world... And I gotta admire his patience, his devotion and his love for me to endure all the crap and all the hell that I give him. You see, I might be really unlucky in most aspects of life, but with love... I sure believe I lucked out.
"But oh, can't you see
that no matter what happens
life goes on and on
And so baby just smile
coz I'm always around you
and I'll make you see
how beautiful life is for you and me
Take a little time baby
See the butterflie's colors
Listen to the birds that were sent to sing for me and you
Can you feel me
This is such a wonderful place to me
Even if there is pain now
Everything will be alright
For as long as the world still turns
there will be night and day
Can you hear me
There's a rainbow always after the rain..."
. by [ margaux ] at [ 8:40 PM ] [ archive ] .
. . . . .
[ Monday, March 08, 2004 ]
I cried again today... for different yet similar reasons.
Life's really shitty right now and I don't know how much more of this can I take...
. by [ margaux ] at [ 7:42 AM ] [ archive ] .
. . . . .
[ Sunday, March 07, 2004 ]
I cried today.
It's been a while since I last cried. Maybe five to six months? I don't know. I can't remember. Chances are, I might not be going to Batangas. Fine, I am not going to Batangas. Screw this life. I hate it. It's not even because I am not going to Batangas, it's just that the situation seemed oh-so-familiar. I was restraining my tears and sniffing as my dad made his long speech as to why they're not letting me go. It seemed so high schoolish. I am 18 for goodness' sake. The scene was just typical of my life... my parents always too conservative, too protective, too paranoid to let me live my own life. I'm so sick of it.
I'm not living at all. I'm just some zombie. I eat, sleep, study, talk to people, blah blah blah. But I can't and don't even make decisions for myself. I don't have control of my life. Sure, I still am their daughter but I just wish they'd loosen they're grip a bit. That they'd trust me, that they'd know I can be independent, that they'd give me more freedom. But no... my life is far from being like that.
I hate it. That's why I cried today.
. by [ margaux ] at [ 1:07 AM ] [ archive ] .
. . . . .
